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The Freeze Factor: A Rabbinical Student's Guide to Dating
Sunday, April 15, 2007
No good date is complete without some delicious Sriracha Sauce!
Scene: A Nice Restaurant / Coffee Shop in Hyde Park (my neighborhood in Cincinnati)
Benjy: Well (insert date's name here), I'm glad we got to finally go out. My schedule has been really crazy this week.
Date: Yeah I'm glad too. (She smiles) So, what do you do again?
Benjy: Actually I'm a rabbinical student
Date: I'm sorry it's loud in here. Did you say you're a medical student? That's so impressive! Where do you go?
Benjy: Um not quite. I'm a rabbinical student... as in, I'm studying to be a rabbi.
Date: (awkward pause) Ok, well I was just at my cousin's bat mitzvah last weekend. That was great.
Benjy: Oh yeah? Yep, gotta love a bat mitzvah. (awkwardness continues)
Date: Oh yeah, big time. Um, I just remembered I've gotta go home and let the dog out. He's probably barking up a storm.
Benjy: I thought you said you had a cat.
Date: Yeah, that's what I meant (she fumbles for her keys). He's probably pretty um well.. ok, bye. (Date runs away quickly)
Rabbinical Students Joel, Liz and I look for good Jewish dates at the Monster Truck Rally. The jury's still out on that one...
Hello Internet Friends,
If you ask some of your single rabbinical student friends, you may find that the exchange above is fairly common. We call it the "freeze factor." On a first date, once you unload the information that you are indeed studying to be a rabbi, a member of the cloth, a clergy-person, your date might indeed freeze. Exit polls from particularly lousy dates (with me) show that sometimes a potential significant other may be scared off by the idea of dating a potential rabbi. Sometimes they think we're judging their every move. Other times they question whether or not they should order a drink with dinner or worse yet... they feel guilty about eating non Kosher food!
Now, not every dating situation has to be a disaster. As my single friends and I have been able to discern these last four years, there seem to be three types of dates, one of which is dangerous, one of which will take some extra work on your part, and one of which is a-ok!
The first type of date is the one discussed earlier. There are some people who have one view of how a rabbi looks and acts, usually informed by their childhood and / or the book/movie The Chosen. Sometimes these situations can be salvaged if you can demonstrate to your date that while Judaism is important to you, there is more to your personality than being a Jewish professional. Here's a solution: excuse yourself for a moment, close your eyes, and remember back to the world before rabbinical school. Be careful though, those events might no longer be current. It's good to do some google research before you leave your house. Then, during dinner, try not to connect said current events to that particular week's Torah portion. These dates can actually turn out pretty well!
Next, the most dangerous date: the rabbi stalker. On this date, you won't have to tell your partner that you're studying to be a rabbi because she'll (or he'll) already know. I'm going to use the female pronoun here as I date women, but just know that I assume there are male rabbi stalkers as well. Ok, back to the date. Often these dates come from JDate or awkward set-ups, where the other person knows a little bit about you. My single friends and I have found that there are some people out there who are interested in your BECAUSE your are studying to be a rabbi! Sometimes they daydream about you chanting Shirat HaYam to them, or worse, they dream of the glory of a semi-public life as a rabbi's spouse. Any signs of these types of thoughts are red flags for you to "get an emergency call from a congregant" and get out of there. Because as great as a rabbi groupie may sound to you now, I promise, it's not healthy!
The final type of date is ideal. Picture it: you and your date have a nice meal at a local restaurant. You enjoy spending time with her and find her interesting, and she only seems semi-freaked out about your becoming a rabbi. Following dinner (and maybe dessert) you suggest going for a movie. The two of you watch "Keeping the Faith," after which your date is even more intrigued! After a few good dates where you get to know each other, she sees your becoming a rabbi as an important part of who you are, but not your defining characteristic... that is, until you attempt to serve gefilte fish on your fourth date.
Good luck out there! I hope you find your bashert!
L'Shalom,
Benjy
Posted by Benjy at 11:33 AM
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Seventh Blog
Thursday, March 15, 2007
Cantor Shore and I belt out a Yism'chu during the Amidah. For the record, I held the final note one second longer than she did.
Hello Internet Friends,
There aren't a whole lot of things that scare me these days. Other than mice, getting trapped inside the ark at Temple Sholom (that's for another blog), and most of the characters on Law and Order SVU, I'm pretty brave these days, not allowing much to scare or intimidate me. However, this past Shabbat was the exception: delivering my fourth-year sermon and leading Shabbat services at HUC. Ok, the service itself wasn't scary, but the anticipation leading to it was pretty unnerving.
Chanting from my best friend the Torah, with my parents to the right and a bunch of high school students at HUC for a Youth Programs event in the back.
Some explanation: on the Cincinnati campus, each 4th year student is required to lead one Shabbat service, in which he or she leads the liturgy along with Cantor Shore, chants the Torah portion and Haftarah portion, and delivers a formal text-based sermon, all of which is videotaped and reviewed by the entire class a few days later. The first time I thought about this service, I figured, "hey, this is no biggie... I can lead a service with my eyes closed." (Although that's a bad idea unless you're meditating) I reasoned that I lead services almost every single Shabbat and often read Torah and deliver sermons. But when the venue is the Hebrew Union College, the pressure builds a bit. As I thought of my professors and classmates sitting in the congregation watching my every move, I decided to prepare even more thoroughly than I usually do for Shabbat. I spent many hours practicing the Torah and Haftarah portions and with my advisor, Rabbi Walter, wrote four drafts of my sermon. I felt good. As I drove to HUC on Saturday morning, I was as calm and collected as Sufjan Stevens, as his music played through my car speakers.
As soon as I walked in the chapel though, I started sweating. "Was I prepared? Did I have everything I needed? Why was I so nervous" I asked myself as sweat started dripping from my forehead. Then I realized that it was literally more than 85 degrees in the chapel. Of course, the chapel sits on top of the campus' main boiler, which apparently is hard to shut off, even when it is 75 degrees outside! We got some windows open, a nice cross-breeze filled the room, and then I knew I was ready to start the service. My family came to Cincinnati from all over the country, so having them in the front row made the service a bit less intimidating. My copy of Mishkan Tefilah was in place, the pianist was warmed-up, Cantor Shore and I had a quick pep-talk, and we took our places on the bima. As the service began, everything just fell into place.
Delivering my sermon. What fun the 4th year sermon is!
Leading the service was one of the best experiences I've had at HUC. I realized just after the service, that leading the service, reading Torah and giving my sermon weren't positive experiences in spite of being at HUC, rather it was such a positive experience because it was at HUC. As we have been continuing to learn for almost four years now, each of us brings different strengths to HUC. When I look around the classroom I see so many different kinds of people – some academics, some incredible pastoral care givers, some writers and some Hebrew scholars. I tend to be more on the quiet side during most classes and it felt good to show my professors and classmates that I'm good at writing and delivering a sermon, that I enjoy leading services.
Ok, I know this has been a sappy blog entry. But I think this weekend taught me a lot about myself and reminded me of what I am capable. As some of you are heading to Israel in a few months to start your Year in Israel, keep believing in yourself! Also, remember that anything more than 10 shekels for felafel is outrageous.
Have a great month!
L'Shalom,
Benjy
Posted by Benjy at 3:08 PM
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Sixth Blog
Thursday, February 15, 2007
Classmate and friend Carmit and I study a text for our Magic class. As usual, I like to help Carmit with the Hebrew. (ok, she's a native Hebrew speaker).
Hello Internet Friends,
I hope this blog post finds you well. Life in Cincinnati is pretty funny as always. Last week we had two snow days following one the week before! Don't worry though, after the couple inches of snow stopped falling, the city Cincinnati was again operational... four or five days later.
I realized recently that throughout the course of this blog I haven't devoted much space to talking about the actual time I spend at the Hebrew Union College everyday. Though my days are packed full of trips to other exciting destinations such as Temple Sholom, the gym, and various sushi restaurants, I spend a lot of time here on campus in Clifton at HUC-JIR. Being a fourth-year student on campus has its fair share of perks. Besides the upper-classman discount in the vending machines, being in my fourth year enables me to actually pick the classes I'm taking, as a majority of them are electives. I thought this month that I would take a few moments and discuss some of the classes in which I am enrolled this semester.
We were reviewing some interesting material from our last class in my notes.
My class week starts with an always-entertaining class called "The Literature of Jewish Magic." No, there aren't many top hats or abused rabbits in this class, and thus far I haven't been asked to saw anyone in half (maybe for the Midterm?). This is a Hebrew Literature class taught by Dr. Susan Einbinder who is a really phenomenal professor. Throughout the course of the semester we have been looking at and will further examine various texts that represent magical beliefs and practices found in Jewish life around the medieval period. So far, the class has been very entertaining. After some initial learning about how magic played / plays a role in Jewish life, we are starting to look at different spells and incantation bowls and are reading the literature containing the rules for writing an amulet. Part of our class is to try out these various types of spells, make an amulet, and record all of our data in a journal. Our spells can't be intended to cause harm to anyone. The spell I tried out last night didn't work, as I woke up this morning my blog had still not been written, and The O.C. is still being cancelled.
Following my Magic class, I head to the American Jewish Archives building for an always-always interesting class in American Southern Jewish History taught by Dr. Gary Zola. Dr. Zola is another great teacher who really makes history come to life. Though our once-a-week class was cancelled two weeks in a row because of snow we were back in class recently learning about the formation of the South and the Jewish hand in making that happen. It has been really interesting so far to learn about how Jews spread throughout the quickly changing American landscape and how they lived their Jewish lives all over the country.
The final class which I will share with you today is a Bible class called "Reading the Bible After the Holocaust," which as you can imagine, is a class that deals with the various aspects of Jewish post-Holocaust theology as it is reflected in writings about and interpretations of the Bible. This is another fascinating class. It is taught by Dr. Jason Kalman, who also does an excellent job helping us think about and examine the Bible through the various lenses of post-Holocaust writers. So far, we have used the writing of Emil Fackenheim, A.J. Heschel, Eliezer Berkovits, Elie Wiesel and others to understand how the Holocaust and other tragic events that have changed the Jewish community have impacted how we read and interpret the Bible. So far we have done extensive study of the Noah story and today began discussing the Akedah.
Ok, maybe not. But playing with "Photo Booth" on my computer can make the study time pass much faster!
While there are more classes to discuss, there isn't much more space to discuss them! As you will consistently see, the greatest assets the College has are its professors, who want nothing more than for us students to succeed. This is a great place to have as a home-base in Cincinnati!
Next month we'll leave Clifton again and head back into the rest of the world! Maybe we'll even stop by the world of Jdate in Cincinnati, which is an endlessly entertaining place. See you next month.
L'Shalom,
Benjy
Posted by Benjy at 12:54 PM
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Fifth Blog
Monday, January 15, 2007
Our lake-side amphitheater Beit Knesset at Camp Interlaken
Shalom Blog-Reading Friend,
Happy New Year! I hope 2007 is going well for you. If you are applying to HUC in the first round of interviews, those are coming up soon... good luck! Just remember to breathe and picture all the people in the room in their underwear. I recommend doing that before the actual interview starts, as it might make things a bit disturbing and awkward. You'll be great!
While the turning of the new year means HUC interviews for some, and a new semester of classes for others of us, it also marks the beginning of a familiar process for me: negotiating the camp contract. Yes, that's right, in my mid-twenties I have still not grown out of going to camp for the summer. While this will be my last full summer on the machaneh, (I don't know of any congregations who will give me 12 weeks off for camp) I feel confident that I will have left the camp a better place, more rich with Jewish content and traditions, more able to grow and innovate.
Two staff members and I celebrate a "Bat Brit" baby naming at our camp life-cycles program
My role at camp has changed quite drastically over the years as I started becoming more interested in Jewish practice and traditions, and even more dramatically after I began studying at Hebrew Union College. I'd like to spend a few minutes talking about the role of a rabbinical student at camp (mine in particular). While I do not want to go into camping professionally, I have learned so much about what my job as rabbi will entail, with my session-long congregation of 250 kids and 70 staff members.
In the summer of each of the last fourteen years I have been attending Camp Interlaken JCC. This is a JCC camp run by the JCC of Milwaukee. At camp I have been a camper, CIT, counselor, co-program director, unit leader and Judaic Director. Working at a JCC camp presents some interesting issues to grapple with, as we are "Jewishly" serving more than just the Reform population. We have to make sure that everyone feels comfortable in our t'filot, in our Judaic programming, and in our daily living. Working at Interlaken is exciting because contrary to the stereotype of JCC camps, it is rich in Jewish tradition and teaching. When you ask our campers what their favorite part of camp is, almost always they will answer, "Shabbat."
Like many camps, we have song-sessions after lunch and dinner each day, which often are in Hebrew and have Jewish themes (thanks Danny Nichols and Rick Recht). We do Birkat HaMazon (once a week in English so the kids know what they are singing) and "Hebrew Word of the Day" to infuse most days with some Hebrew learning. As a rabbinical student at camp I've been given the authority to innovate and strengthen Judaic programming. During the past three years we have had and optional daily Mincha service at random locations around camp (more kids show up when we do it on the Pontoon boat!) which draws a good-size group of kids who want some sort of daily prayer experience, as we only offer camp-wide services on Shabbat. Our Shabbat services are very camper-friendly. Friday night Kabbalat Shabbat is a musical service (we have our Shabband) in which the musical prayers are interrupted only for creative writings written on a Shabbat theme by the group of campers who is leading services. We encourage singing, clapping, and lots of dancing in our lake-side sanctuary. After services and a Shabbat story by a guest educator or director, the kids go the Chadar Ochel for Shabbat dinner, an amazing Shabbat song session and Israeli dancing before the night concludes around 9:45.
A camper-made mural indicating four of our core Jewish Values: Eretz Yisrael, Tikkun Olam, Tzelem Elohim, and Gemilut Hasadim, all of which are taught in our Kehillah B'ya'ar, our community in the woods.
Shabbat morning services are my favorite time at camp. In the last few years we have completely overhauled how these services work, making them much more kid-friendly. The service is shaped around an ongoing five-part schtick, which involves some kind of camp-based story formed around a theme from the Torah portion of the week. For example, camper Moses comes to the evil director at Camp Outerlaken asking him to "let my campers go!" The service is full of singing, dancing, schtick, lots of laughter and even some learning! Basing the service around the schtick enables even the youngest campers to stay in-tune with the service throughout its length.
Along with all that, I do Bat / Bar Mitzvah tutoring, teaching with campers and staff during the week, occasionally help the social worker with troubled campers, teach a daily chug called "Judaism Gone Wild" and much more.
I don't have enough room here to tell you about all the great things that we do at Camp Interlaken. What I can tell you though is that when you are wondering what to do during this next summer, I recommend you think seriously about working at camp. It is an amazing way to strengthen your Jewish skills and leave your mark on people's lives.
Ok, that's enough for now. Next month we'll come back to Cincinnati and see what's going on here! Have a great month!
L'Shalom,
Benjy
Posted by Benjy at 11:34 AM
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Fourth Blog
Friday, December 15, 2006
See how confusing the grocery store can be?! No wonder I was confused...
Hello blog friends! I hope you're having a good winter and a Chanukah of light. It has been a busy season for us rabbinic student types lately. Classes have just ended, final papers, projects, and exams loom on the horizon. Of course, many of us also have congregational responsibilities coming up - weekly services, Chanukah programs, religious school activities, youth group outings, young adult programs etc. Sometimes it feels that we have so much going on that we don't often have time to stop and reflect on what we're doing; on how far we've come. While I absolutely realize that I have a lot to learn before I'm ordained a rabbi in May of 2008, I also have had a few moments in the past week or so to think about how far I've come since my first days at HUC in Jerusalem.
I had a phenomenal Israel experience. The challenge of moving to a foreign country to start a new chapter in my life was an exciting one. After warming up to my new surroundings, I really enjoyed living in Jerusalem. I really liked the craziness of it all - Jerusalem is definitely a crazy place. Where else in the world could you, while walking to school, pass two or three people on the street claiming to be biblical characters? I even found myself attracted to a woman claiming to be Miriam, but used my better judgment and kept walking. While I enjoyed the semi-attractive biblical characters on the street, I grew to love my time at HUC Jerusalem for other reasons too. One reason that my experience was so great was the teaching staff on the Jerusalem campus. The teachers there are so good at welcoming in students at every level of Judaic and Hebrew knowledge. They are patient and caring - they really helped start my HUC experience in a positive manner. My Hebrew teacher, Hannah Segui was so wonderful. Even though I was in Kitah Aleph Plus (that's pronounced "ploos" for those not as proficient in Hebrew as I am), I started feeling confident in my ability in Hebrew in the classroom and around Jerusalem. I could give directions to a cab driver in Hebrew to many places in the city. Most of our classes were taught in a combination of Hebrew and English. Sometimes, in a restaurant, I would even demand to see a Hebrew menu, insulted that the waitress mistook me for an English speaker. Of course, this was usually followed by many sheepish questions for her as I tried to both decipher the Hamburger choices and pry my foot out of my mouth at the same time.
Maybe if everything was this clear I would have had an easier time! By the way, they pronounce it "Lincolin"
One evening, late in December, my "Hebrew ego" took a serious blow. The outing started as an innocent trip to the grocery store - a near-weekly occurrence that was almost always entertaining. My entertained smile faded though, as I grabbed what I thought was laundry detergent - the same "laundry detergent" I had been buying for six months—and noticed that in small English print on the back it said, "fabric softener." Yes, that's right, for my first six months in Israel I had been washing all of my clothes in fabric softener, and then softening them with a different brand of fabric softener. You can imagine my dismay. I looked at the bottle again - definitely the same one that had sat on my washing machine for three months, where its similar predecessor sat before. Suddenly everything made sense. My clothes always smelled great coming out of the washing machine, but they never seemed much cleaner than when they went in. All my white socks had turned grey. Dirt from a hike in the Carmel Mountains remained on my shirt after two washes. After basking in my own ineptitude with my friend Erich, I put the fabric softener down, and bought a bottle of Tide, imported from the USA. A little bit more expensive? Yes. Actually detergent? Also yes.
While I now know the difference between laundry detergent and fabric softener, I also constantly remember how much there always is to learn. That's one of the great things about becoming a rabbi - our daily experiences with people we meet on the street, in our congregations, and throughout our lives can shape and change the way we do our jobs. We can always learn more and grow more. While on occasion it may take six months of washing our clothes in fabric softener to remember that, it is one of the most important lessons I have learned at HUC thus far.
Have a great month! See you in 2007!
L'shalom,
Benjy
Posted by Benjy at 2:48 PM
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Sunday Sunday Sunday!
Wednesday, November 15, 2006
Boker tov! Checking in with the Principal and Religious School Coordinator
as the day starts on Sunday morning.
Hello Internet friends! This past week has been particularly crazy here in Cincinnati. It's midterm time in school, my boss and senior rabbi at Temple Sholom, Gerry Walter, has been gone for the past couple weeks visiting our congregation's college students at their colleges and universities as part of his "Rabbi on the Road" program, and there were two new episodes of the O.C. on TV near the end of last week! Talk about a lot to do! I thought that this month I would share my busy-ness with you, and give you a snap-shot of one of my most exciting days of the week... Sunday.
First though, let me remind you of the jobs I do here in Cincinnati along with being a fourth-year student. As you may remember from an earlier blog, I am the Rabbinic Intern at Temple Sholom, one of the four Reform synagogues here. Sholom is a great size – about three hundred and fifty families. My duties as Rabbinic Intern often feel like those of an Assistant Rabbi, though I am quite aware that I am not yet a rabbi! I almost always lead at least one of our Shabbat services, teach in the Religious School, lead Religious School services, advise the Senior Youth Group, teach an Adult Education class, do weekly pastoral visits to hospitals, coordinate young adult programming, meet pastorally with congregants, write and deliver sermons, conduct Torah studies, and teach in the Cincinnati Reform Jewish High School with Rabbi Walter. It is often a very busy job, but Rabbi Walter is a great mentor (raise, please), and the job simply couldn't be more rewarding. I am also doing an extended unit of Clinical Pastoral Education, which is a requirement for Cincinnati students. I am a Chaplain Intern on the fourth floor of Jewish Hospital. I act as a hospital chaplain, visiting, listening, and praying with patients on my floor. It is also a very fulfilling experience.
Sunday morning Religious School services with the Ruach Meter! The louder you sing, the happier the Ruach Meter is!
Sundays are usually one of my busiest days of the week. The day begins with my sweet sweet snooze button, which is worn thin from my many attempts to get a few more moments of sleep before the day begins. I usually get to temple around 8:45 a.m. Upon getting there I check voicemail and email and check in with the religious school principals. Our religious school is combined with Rockdale Temple, so on any given Sunday morning there are two rabbis and two rabbinic interns in the building. We usually check in with each other, figure out who is leading services for the Pre K – 2nd grades, and who for the 3rd-6th grades and prepare for that. I usually lead one of the services along with one of the rabbis or principals. I'm particularly proud to have created a "Ruach Meter" which is a brightly colored box with lights on it that sits in services and "measures" the students' ruach (energy) during services! The Ruach Meter's voice is my good friend and Rockdale Temple's Rabbinic Intern Asher with a wireless microphone in an adjacent room. We check in with the Ruach Meter during services and the kids love it! They've been singing pretty loudly lately... Needless to say, we have a really fun and pretty ridiculous school. After services I am usually in a classroom making a guest teaching appearance (I took the kindergarten students to "Torah Town" aka the sanctuary) or just wandering into classrooms to say hello. At 11:00 a.m. each Sunday, I teach Adult Hebrew for Beginners. The class is huge with 26 people enrolled. It's much different teaching adults, but really great. After more time in the classrooms, I'm usually free until 4:00 p.m. or so. During that time, I do a little homework, go to the gym, spend an obscene amount of time on facebook, plan for a couple of sure-to-be awkward Jdates, and organize myself for the week. In the late afternoon and evening there is usually a Youth Group event or meeting. Then Cincinnati Reform Jewish High School begins at 7:00 p.m. and goes until 8:45 p.m.
By the end of Sunday evening I usually feel like I've just run a marathon (not that I've ever run a marathon, but I'm pretty empathetic) – exhausted but really proud of all I've accomplished during the day. By the time my head hits the pillow on Sunday night I'm out like a light. Then Monday morning... the rest of the week begins! More to come next month!
L'Shalom,
Benjy
Posted by Benjy at 12:36 PM
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Second Blog
Sunday, October 15, 2006
The Sanctuary of historic Temple B'nai Israel in Victoria, Texas with
original woodwork from 1923.
It was a hot, rainy September evening when I pulled my rental car into the parking lot of the Fairfield Inn in Victoria, Texas. I swallowed hard, gathering up my nerves, as I went inside to check in. Momentarily, I thought I had accidentally driven to another country. Inside, the guests checking in ahead of me (native Texans) were jovially conversing with the front desk clerk about some sort of festival in town. The only word I was clearly able to discern from my vantage point was "y'all," which was uttered at least thirty times. I stepped up to the desk and gave the guy my name. When he saw that my reservation was from Cincinnati, he said, "well well well, you must be the new raaa-bbi," with a deep Southern drawl. I looked around for a moment. Could this be the case? Was he talking to me? Was I the new rabbi? I quickly corrected him, "well yeah, the student rabbi." He did some work and handed me the key. "Ok then, you're in room 309, Rabbi. Have a good one." Looking back, I shouldn't have been so surprised that he addressed me as Rabbi. Of course I knew that my role in Victoria was ostensibly to occupy a rabbinical role. However, that was the first time someone had ever addressed me as "Rabbi." Being addressed that way filled me with a sense of awe and pride. Just then, a question came echoing through my head: "Wait, what the heck do I know about being a rabbi?"
Temple B'nai Israel in downtown Victoria.
I pulled up to the temple the next morning, Erev RoshHashanah, and stood outside for a few moments and once again, let the weight of this new job I was undertaking rest on my shoulders. The building was gorgeous. I hadn't imagined it that way. I figured it would be an old, run-down building in terrible shape. Yes, it was indeed old (built in 1923), but also beautifully maintained. The yard was well taken care of, the breathtaking stained-glass windows gleaned in the morning light, the words inscribed on the top of the building stood out boldly, "B'nai Israel." I realized in those few moments, that I was becoming part of this congregation's history, that I was the next link in its chain of leaders. I took out my newly-obtained key, placed it in the lock and turned. I was ready to accept the challenge.
I would love to say that from there on out, my first two weeks in Victoria (many of us stay at our pulpits between Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur) went completely smoothly and that I felt 100% competent the entire time I was there. However, those statements would fit in better at say, www.ihavenosenseofreality.com or www.benjyisaliar.org than here on the HUC blog. I will say, however, that in those first two weeks as a student rabbi I learned a tremendous amount about what it really means to be a rabbi, and I learned even more about who I am. In Victoria, I led services (with and without the choir), which felt pretty natural to me. The services were a lot of work to plan ahead of time, but once I was on the bima, I felt pretty comfortable. I was able to share many meals with congregants, slowly getting to really know the congregation. I was given the opportunity to teach children and adults, both of whom presented their own challenges and their own rewards. The part of the job which was most nerve-racking during those first two weeks was the pastoral stuff – doing nursing home, homebound, and hospital visits. Many of my first hours in Victoria were spent in these settings, awkwardly trying to understand what my pastoral role, as student rabbi, entailed. After a while, I began to realize that those congregants wanted the same things all of us want – someone to listen to them, someone to laugh with them, someone to bless them. I know now that during the two years I served as student rabbi in Victoria, I grew the most as a pastoral care giver.
"I can't hear you guys..." Musical services at B'nai Israel.
So, while my first visit to my student pulpit wasn't perfect, it was definitely life changing. It was during those two weeks that I began to understand and appreciate the incredible impact a rabbi (or student rabbi for that matter) can have on his or her congregants' lives and vice versa. Though I knew then, more than ever, that I had a lot to learn before ordination, I also knew without a doubt, that I was right where I belonged. Maybe next month I'll tell y'all about the chicken-fried-steak incident...
L'Shalom,
Benjy
Posted by Benjy at 10:08 AM
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First Blog
Friday, September 15, 2006
There's still time in rabbinical school to go out for Thai food! Marshal,
Ana (both HUC Cinci) and I enjoying some relaxation time.
Shalom! My name is Benjy, and I'm a fourth-year rabbinical student at HUC-JIR in Cincinnati. While I feel pretty comfortable with that title right now, I must admit that I haven't always been a fourth-year rabbinical student at HUC. Believe it or not, I haven't always been a rabbinical student. In fact, I often think of how shocked and amazed the high-school version of me would be, were we to meet today. Along with taking classes at HUC, I am the Rabbinic Intern of Temple Sholom, one of the four Reform synagogues in Cincinnati, and a Chaplain Intern at Jewish Hospital in the Clinical Pastoral Education program. I'm twenty-six years old, love to play and listen to all types of music and wait... I think I'm lost...is this JDate?
Sushi Shabbat! Shabbat dinner at our apartment where we attempted to make sushi!
To my knowledge nobody was sent to the hospital immediately following dinner...
Anyway, to more clearly understand who I am and how I ended up at the Hebrew Union College, allow me to give you a bit of background info. First of all, I grew up in Fox Point, Wisconsin, a suburb of Milwaukee. I'm part of a big family – four children: three boys and a girl, of which I'm the second oldest. While our family was not observant per se, my parents instilled in each of us a strong set of Jewish values by which to live our lives. Other than my time at Camp Interlaken, JCC (where I still work), I was not formally involved with any Jewish organizations while in high school. My high school had a large Jewish population, so while most of my friends were Jewish, participation in Jewish youth groups was never something in which I was particularly interested. I went away to college to a small school, the University of Wisconsin – Parkside. Parkside is one of thirteen UW schools around the state. Soon after beginning at UW-Parkside, I realized something was missing in my life. I then understood that for the first time in my life, I wasn't surrounded by Jews, and that I really missed being a part of a Jewish community. By the end of first semester, I was sneaking away from my friends on Saturday nights to do Havdallah, proudly displaying a menorah in my window during Chanukah, and even secretly downloading some Jewish music onto my computer (which I'm still pretty ashamed of). Soon after, I discovered a small synagogue in the area, where I began teaching on Sunday mornings. After some time, I found myself there on many Friday nights and Saturday mornings too. The rabbi at that synagogue became a mentor to me. Over the next four years, she and the whole Jewish community gave me the confidence and experience to apply to HUC at the beginning of my senior year.
At Camp Interlaken JCC in Wisconsin. Simcha, Elana (HUC Cinci) and I tried to ride a
bike together... not my proudest moment...
That summer I boarded a plane to Israel and began my rabbinical journey in Jerusalem. I had a phenomenal experience in Israel during my first year (more detail in a later entry), but was excited to return stateside and begin my life in Cincinnati. During the summers, I am a Unit Leader and Judaic Specialist at Camp Interlaken JCC in Eagle River, Wisconsin. I love that I'm able to return to camp each summer while I'm a student at HUC. Since returning to Cincinnati, I have been a teacher and Youth Director at Temple Sholom, and have had many opportunities to do song-leading as well. I also served as a Student Rabbi for two years in Victoria, Texas, where there is a small congregation who needed a Student Rabbi once a month. Serving in Victoria was incredibly rewarding and at the same time quite humbling. It's a fabulous place!
When not traveling, working on homework, or at temple, I enjoy hanging out with friends, going out for dinner, watching The O.C., checking out some live music, working-out (I'm a little scared of my trainer), and enjoying life. This journey toward becoming a rabbi has been absolutely fantastic so far. I'm looking forward to sharing my experiences in Cincinnati with you during the course of this year!
Shanah Tovah, uM'tukah! Have a Happy and Sweet New Year!
L'Shalom,
Benjy
Posted by Benjy at 2:20 PM
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